What I Wish I Could Tell the 10-Year-Old Me
ADHD in childhood - What I wish I could have told myself
If I could go back and sit beside the 10-year-old me, I wouldn’t try to fix them.
I’d sit quietly first. They wouldn’t trust me right away. They’d already learned—too young—that trusting
too easily could hurt.
But if they looked up long enough to listen, I’d say this.
You’re different....
You feel things harder. You think in ways other people
don’t.
And that’s not wrong.
They’ll try to fix you. You’ll be told to speak up. Smile more. Be less dramatic. You’ll get pushed into things you hate—like cadets or clubs—so you can "socialise more."
You’ll be called clumsy. Lazy. Difficult. A smart arse. You’ll forget things, interrupt, lose track of time. Other kids will laugh at you. Teachers will misunderstand you. Sometimes it’ll feel easier to just disappear.
But none of that means you’re broken. It means you’re not like them.
And actually, a lot of people
aren’t like them. You just don’t know that yet.
You’re not broken. You bite your fingers until they bleed. You cry without knowing why. You get angry and then feel sick with guilt. You trust too fast because you believe in kindness. And when that trust gets used against you—when people lie or laugh or turn, you start to think it’s your fault.
It’s not....
Your sensitivity isn’t weakness. It’s proof you feel deeply. No one taught you how to hold that, that’s
all.
And you don’t need to stop feeling. You just need space to be safe in it.
You’re not alone. There are others like you. Quiet, curious, intense. Kids who feel too much and know too much and still get told they’re behind. Kids who can’t say what they’re feeling, so they hold it in until it bursts. Kids who don’t understand why the world feels so sharp.
Back then, we didn’t have words like “neurodivergent.” Just strange. Just wrong. Just shame.
I wish I
could have shown you what was coming. The diagnosis. The clarity. The people who get it. The books that
explain things you never had language for. The communities that hold space for brains like yours.
I wish I could show you what it feels like to exhale. To finally understand you were never the problem.
ADHD in childhood doesn’t look like it’s supposed to. Not always. Not in girls, not in boys like me. Not in the kids who stare out the window or hyperfocus on things they love. Not in the ones who follow rules and then fall apart the second they get home.
ADHD in childhood can look like zoning out. Like daydreaming. Like messy handwriting and late homework
and socks that just feel wrong.
It can look like stomachaches every morning before school.
It
can look like shame.
You don’t need to perform. You don’t have to act normal to be accepted.
You don’t have to twist
yourself into someone else just to stay safe.
That mask you build will help you survive for a while.
But it will exhaust you.
And one day, you’ll drop it. Not gently. You’ll be too tired for that. You’ll
collapse under the weight of trying to be someone you’re not. And when you do, you’ll find something
unexpected underneath.
You....
Still whole.
Still worthy.
Still strange and intense and brilliant in your own offbeat way.
And you’ll realise you were never meant to fit. You were meant to be.
That fire argument with the
headmaster? You were right(Discovered, not invented. Let them deal with it.)
To anyone still carrying that kid inside.
Maybe you were the weird one too. The one who knew what they felt, but not how to show it. The one who got laughed at for being too much, or ignored for being too quiet. The one who was told to try harder, when they were already trying everything.
Maybe you’re still carrying their voice. Maybe it still whispers that you’re not enough. Or too much. Or
somehow both.
Maybe you’re still masking, even now.
You’re not broken either.
You can stop performing.
You can stop proving.
You were always enough.
Even at 10.
Reflection
If you could speak to your younger self—the one before the mask, before the shame, before the diagnosis—what would you say?
Say it now. Say it out loud.
That voice still deserves to be heard.
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Further Reading
Want to understand more about how ADHD shows up in childhood?
This article is a great place to start:
ADHD Symptoms in Children – ADDitude Magazine
It breaks down what ADHD really looks like in kids -
beyond the stereotypes.